Gallipoli, October, 23, 1015
I write to you to tell you about my living conditions here. Today I woke up from my four hours rest and the first thing I saw was a rat in my hand, but it is not a surprise for me. I’ve been here for only two weeks and I fell like I was death in life, everything is so dirty, even dirtier tan my room.
I miss everytning, sometimes I dream with the streets of my city, but then a shot wakes me up and come back to this humaless reality.
War is horrible! My feet hurt, my stomach is tired of eating nasty and cold stuff, but the worst thing is my soul. Anyone can stand so much pain.
I miss you so much,,, I’ll be back… Kisses.
I write to you from the trench. It’s lunch time and some people write to their families too and I thought I would have to because I promise you that I would do it. I would like to tell you taht everything is fine, that I’m fine, that it’s not as as I thought it would be, but you also made me promise I ‘d tell the truth, and I will do it , but maybe you won’t like it.
My searest sister, I had always thought that I would go to heaven becuase I have always obeyed, and this is why I can’t understand why God sent me to hell, because yes, this has to be hell since I can’t imagine anything worse. I’ve seen my mates die, and also my enemies, fighting in a trench as me, suffering the same losses, the same conditions, seeing the worst disasters that nature could ever imagine, and I ask myself… are we really so different?
We are both seeing people die, humans, it doesn’t matter which side they are, seeing how they lose any chance to come back home, and in the meanwhile surviving the rain, the cold weather, the tiredness, the pain, the hunger… We are fighting in a war where no one wins, because seriously Violet, I don’t know if there is going to be any human to be the winner.
My love, you have to be strong for mum and dad. I don’t know if I will come back. I’m sorry, maybe I should have lied to you, but I believe you are strong and do whatever . Listen to me, whatever you want, and if I don’t come back, promise me you will move on, because I would live this six months for ten years If I knew that I would hear your laugh again, at least once.
The human who most loves you in the world,